NAT themad

RELINK.

2006-06-13T23:11:00.000+08:00

RELINK!
NATTHEMAD @ LJ

stupid blogger is done pissing me off. and im going to start a whole new "life" somewhere else. byebye bad and very few good memories!

tested and true

2006-06-13T00:28:00.000+08:00

go listen to 'tested and true' by secondhand serenade.

narcissitic

2006-06-11T01:11:00.000+08:00

just thought i'd put up some recent photos.

andy: that's the face i like to see you wearing. (: glad you're better now.

paul: hope you're okay now. please dont emo all. you have all of us (me, elias, ashley, cc, tiantian, majo, your family, etc.) with you always yea? this idol thing is what you wanted, so just enjoy it while it lasts. so just remember to call if you need to talk about anything okay. yes, we do miss you very much.

yea, and im just feeling a wee bit narcissistic today. that explains the first pic. haha.

hello im NatTheMad. and if im just bad news, then you're a liar.

2006-06-08T23:11:00.000+08:00

hello im NatTheMad. and if im just bad news, then you're a liar.

wow. im amazed how you could put a lie on the net so openly. of course only a naive kid like me would believe whatever a sneaky old bastard like you told me. from the excuses you gave to this. not very honest from the start were you? wait, you dont have to answer that. you just totally contradicted yourself. you say im self justifying (a "saint" <-- seems like your favourite word to use to try to make someone look bad). you meet a girl and you tell her things to assure her you do like her, and now you say you never did like her. stop being such a coward. you think everyone thinks you're perfect. you think you're perfect, with your guitars, money and the genre of music you are into (im not saying indie is bad, you just think it makes you somewhat more matured/cool/whateverbull. HA!). you think i'd never read this? you think i'd keep it quiet or confront you personally? damn, if you could just set a big fat lie out like that to make yourself a "saaaaaint", then i dont mind telling you and everyone openly that you're just a creep. maybe your friends believe you, but i dont think you have many REAL friends in the first place, even your current close friends think there's something wrong with you. come on, you're practically 23, you hang out with people years younger than you. looks like your old schoolmates dont miss you as much as you miss them, and maybe when you stop lying and pretending to like/love someone, you'd have one less ex girlfriend in your little chart where you mark how many girls you've slept/dated/made out with. why are you even writing an entry about this when you say you DONT care (though after reading it this has provided me with some sort of emotional and mental stimulation)? when you have the guts to tell the truth and not half truths, maybe your penis would grow bigger from that pathetic party packed supermarket hotdog that it is now.

hmmm, i guess that's why you chose to write it all in third party. that's not being very direct now is it?

stupid shit

2006-06-08T00:59:00.000+08:00

okay, and im too lazy to post anymore pictures or what. cause im also uploading them into my yahoo account. mhmmmm.

and recently, i've been hearing funky rumours about myself. woot. i dont get why people who are supposedly older and more matured are just so sad. okay, shall not generalise. yes, im pinpointing a few, and to be exact a few jc kids and a few people i sorta know. i dont get why telling each other that nat sleeps around is fun and entertaining. juicy, yes. but srsly. like come up with better gossip in the forum please. maybe nat ate a sock, or nat made out with a lampost, or nat humped her fender bass amp, or nat doesnt give a flying fuck about anything this funky anymore. i cant care who knows about what i did/didnt do anymore. i mean, if you want to confirm things, just come ask me lah, since you're that kaypoh. gawwwd.

okay, that's about it. my legs and my ass hurt. ):

ugh.

2006-06-06T16:27:00.000+08:00

i've been up since two hours ago. it feels like the longest two hours of my life. and for some reason, i dont know why but im really really woozy today. i feel so disorganised. i think it's time i drew up a calendar for each month and note down where i have to be and all. yes, i know im like half the year late. oh yea, and now i remember i have to go for ij campfire later on. i cant even remember what time i wanna be there. i guess im not watching the clock as i usually do today. whywhywhywhy. i feel so blank today, and i really dont know why, but i feel so empty. i look for like the silliest things in the world to make myself laugh. maybe i just need to go to school and occupy myself. maybe i should go to church and pray. maybe i need my old friends around. maybe i just need to go back to upper thomson. i miss claire, ally, val, dhini and i cant remember who else. it used to feel so much like home. dont even ask me what home is. even if i knew what home was, it's not like i could go back or try to make things feel like home again. i really dont know. i really feel empty. i cant say i feel sad, cause im not. i definitely cannot say im happy, cause there are too many things just missing from this picture. the more i think about it, the less i want to do anything. oh well, i guess now that i have these two weeks, i can actually get around to taking photos or smth. ugh. the left side of my head hurts. brilliant.

anyways, here are some songs that somehow relate to how i feel/makes me feel better:
new american classic - taking back sunday
the song of songs - inhidings (shaun emo leong's band. haha.)
a lonely september - the plain white t's
suicide note - disagree
broken heart (acoustic) - dashboard confessional
there went the world - number one fan
i wont spend another night alone - the ataris
california - copeland

erm, okay. yea, i havent been listening to any screamy things, cause basically, nat doesnt feel angry or hurt. nat feels messed up, empty and blank. i think i better go get ready to leave my house and all. i feel like putting a picture up. but then maybe after tonight's campfire, i'd have something better to offer than whatever it is in my computer now.

wallet

2006-06-06T01:18:00.000+08:00

getting off my chest, the story ends.

i thought you should know, you're not making this easy.

wireless less

2006-06-04T14:43:00.000+08:00

okay. i cannot update my blog regularly anymore due to the sudden disappearance of my wireless connection in my room. and right now im using my mom's computer, so yea. ugh. i actually have photos i wanna post but iom too lazy to fetch the card reader here and i know i can ask my dad for the password to our home's wireless, but i will get to doing that at a good time. so right now, you guys hold onto your panties and try not to cry, cause i have pictures of paul twohill coming up. yes, paul, CONGRATS. and his fan club thing is getting a bit weird and quite annoying. all these groupies ah, PAUL, MAKE THEM STOP FOLLOWING US TO PRATA HOUSE PLEASE. sheeeeeeeeeesh. okay, byebye.

it really sucks being wireless less. ):

SNAPPPPPPPPPPPP!

2006-05-28T19:23:00.000+08:00

HALLOW. THIS IS HOW I SPEND MY SUNDAY:

WAKE UP AT 2PM
CHECK MY LAPPY
GO DOWN FOR LUNCH
COME BACK TO MY LAPPY
FALL ASLEEP INSTEAD OF GOING TO CHURCH
CHECK MY LAPPY AGAIN

AND IM STILL WAITING FOR THE NEXT THING TO HAPPEN. HI EVERYONE, THIS IS NAT HEADING FOR HELL. I HONESTLY CANNOT WAIT FOR TMR TO COME. GOING TO SCHOOL (OR BASICALLY GETTING OUT OF THE HOUSE) GIVES ME A REASON TO LIVE. I AM REALLY GOING TO DIE A FAT DISGUSTING MORON NOW AND ROT ON THE LEFT SIDE OF HELL. HAWHAW.

okay, im seriously snapping. it must be the really really BAAAAAAAD photos i took ytd. i feel quite embarrassed looking at them. i really should've tested the effects before doing this and that and focusing myself! UGH. my compulsiveness thing is catching up to me again. wootwoot. i really need to get my act together. for what, i also dont know. HAHA. cause in rp, there's noooo homework to do. HAWHAW. so like i dont find myself learning anything new or anything at all. UGH. maybe i really should consider that flower arranging course my mom has been asking me to go for. HAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW. okay. lalalalalala. i wonder what's for dinner. or maybe my dad hsa given up on feeding me. my mom and brother are in bintan. i supp to go to bintan, but cause of church (which i didnt go to in the end) and mentorship which is after school tmr, i am still in shittypore missing out on taking pretty pictures of the clean and white beaches of bintan. GAH. okay, like in a few seconds you all may go see LATEST PHOTOS for some of bismuth's gig photos. i took like daaaaaaaamn alot lah. cb. but yet it doesnt look that fantastic. STUPID SHIT NAT BRAIN ME. okay. yea. it's better to click on SLIDESHOW VIEW rather than look at them one by one yea.

so things you should do this evening if you're bored:
click on "latest photos"
go to album "BISMUTH @ westmall"
and click "slideshow view"
BUT remember to press the "stop" button cause then you can look at them leisurely,
by clicking on the "next" (>>) button of course.

YUP. okay. go knock yourselves out. BYE.

2006-05-27T03:12:00.000+08:00

finally it's a friday! i tell you, i havent even done my rj and it's past 11.59pm. HAHA. like a... OH SHIT. yes, im gonna get a D or smth lah. fuckk. it's like saturday alrdy. and bismuth will be gigging at westmall today at 4.45pm. yea, westmall is like bukit batok. /: and bong, im sorry i couldnt make it for your gig. ): i'll try my best to be at your next though. watched xmen at lido this evening after school. wasnt all that great though. /: but at least i wasnt like really bored. haha. that's it i guess. till tmr when i post more photos or smth.

END.

2006-05-25T23:38:00.000+08:00

as my classmate, charles, asked me online ths evening... another nat holiday? well, yes. it is a nat holiday! hahaha. spent it with chris and gradually met others along the way. i guess it was pretty fun though we hardly did anything but eat, walk around, steal some boxes, etc. haha. yes, we shall have photos. (:

OKAY. no morezxzxzx. yea, im going to school tmr lah. shutttuppppzx. haha. okay. night!

forgetful

2006-05-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

wahh. i tell you. i cannot remember stuff properly today lah. forgot i had UT, forgot to bring pens, forgot to bring jacket, forgot to bring mp3, and forgot the other stuff i forgot lah. geeees.

anyways, i seriously think people cant read though they visit this blog so often enough to tag dumb comments. like helloooo... dont be annonymous- im not entertained by you and neither will i entertain you by feeling all hurt cause you all dislike me. dont you guys have anything better to do? grow up lah. you say im rude? like hello? you're childish and low-lifed to even visit this page only to insult me. daaaymn... FUCK OFF. i could go check your ip and trace you, but i dont. cause i honestly think you dont deserve to be looked up, and neither do i have that much spare time to. and just for the record, yes, i do hang out with guys more often than i hang out with girls these days, so if that makes me a slut, then you must be pretty superficial to judge me this way. i hope you had fun reading this entry, cause it's specially dedicated to you. so scraaaaaaaam!

okay, im done. and im like a daaaamn tired, i deserve some sleep now. good night. (:

STUPID MSN.

2006-05-22T23:25:00.000+08:00

stupid msn is not letting me sign in. i feel really annoyed. wheeee. ):

anyways, im getting quite annoyed with the anonymous taggers on my tagboard. please ah... leave your name. especially if you have something nasty to say. do it with some guts please. dumb cunts.

2006-05-22T22:06:00.000+08:00

When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry

You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it ~~hurts~~
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul

I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

2006-05-21T15:04:00.000+08:00

orientation camp. was daaaamn tiring. anyway... some photos from over the weekend.

andy, if you get to read this. i pray that you will be okay. im really scared you did that. please know you were never alone.

changes

2006-05-19T23:42:00.000+08:00

haha. school today was awesome... cause i didnt go. HAHA. chris, ash, shaun and i decided to go on a holiday at sentosa a bit. hahaha. though we did a lot of stoning and burying of chicken bones, it was wayyy better than going to school lah. heh. met the band after that and all. it's been soooo long since wilfy, chris, leslie and i hung out. and also leon joined us, cause he's our new rhythm guitarist. it kinda feels really different without bryan, but i guess change is good. yup.

anyways, im too lazy to use photo bucket to post pics here now. so just go to "latest photos" in a bit. cause im uploading the photos i took today. the album title would be "escaping rp @ sentosa". hahahaha. and donn, too bad you didnt come! ): anyways, hope your arm and everything else is okay. tmr is our stewwwpit orientation camp, which ends mega late. and that pisses me off. im still leaving at 6.45, i dont care! stupid shit. im not missing elias's gig for a camp.

invisible again.

2006-05-18T19:49:00.000+08:00

maybe it's cause im this invisible to you, and you're that oblivious to me.

IF I TOLD YOU THAT THIS WAS KILLING ME, WOULD YOU ~~STOP~~?

so drain out my lungs, before the fluid brings a choke.

STUPID SHIT SD CARD!

2006-05-17T22:04:00.000+08:00

okay. i am seriously damn damn damn damn damn DAAAAAAAMN pissed with myself. i accidently deleted like A WHOLE LOAD of photos in my camera sd card, that i was meaning to upload in like five minutes from now. but nooo. I ACCIDENTLY DELETED EVERY FUCKING FILE IN IT. so i cant even go to the damn recycling bin to retrieve it. you may ask why i deleted them all like that. well, cause there were TWO of the same files in the card when i open it in the computer, and it just so happened i couldnt save one picture i decided to edit, due to too much memory space being used. then i so smartly thought if i deleted one of the folders, i would have twice as much memory space. AND SO I DID. then when i opened the other file, WHOOHOO! IT IS ALL GONE TOO. STUPID SHIT HEAD. i dont even know what to blame. my computer or myself. okay, myself. since i didnt bother backing up the files. UGH. i am so so so frickkkingggg pissedddd!! piece of shit lah. knnbccb! ):

and as you can see, i have NO photos to put on this entry though i took sooo many with andy today. ARGH. fuck lah! STUPID SHIT ME. and WHY did my stupid memory card have double of EVERYTHING in the first place?! STUPID. ): im damn annoyeddd. GAHH!

A and A :D

2006-05-16T22:06:00.000+08:00

it's ironic how i feel so damn tired and not able to talk to most people online atm,
but im able to blog. ha. oh, and i have to email in my stupid writing to cheng, the scriptwriting facil, for our mentorship. i have no idea what possessed me to turn off my lappy and manually write down my piece when i was in school. ugh. now i have to transfer it into word doc and find cheng's email allll over again. /: oh well, besides that i feel like putting pictures up.

cheers to ally, whom made it seem we would be inseparable. and to ash, whom i never thought i'd have to see everyyyydayy and is always online talking to me. HAHA.

okay, now i have to do that stewwwpit email. i kinda dont wanna send it, cause it's a little personal. /:

four ways to look at this and more.

2006-05-15T20:59:00.000+08:00

there are so many ways to look at a simple object like this lamp standing in my room. however, these are only four ways i came up with, cause if i were to look for more, i doubt you'd see an end to this entry. my point is, if i took the negativity given and tried to turn it around, i would've constructed an empire of improvement for myself. likewise, if i took positivity rewarded to me, i could gloat over my winnings and grow complacent over a period of time and neglect the need to prove others i could do so much better.

for you, i'd keep my chin up and my smile brighter than any lightbulb.

guessing games.

2006-05-14T16:12:00.000+08:00

haha. okay. so like im really bored now, since it's another boring sunday afternoon. and im sure whoever comes here would be bored too. so umm... we'll have a little game! :D

SPOT THE SIMILARITIES!

hahahahahahaha. sorry, i used a camera phone to take those. so it's not as clear.

okay, and a bonus question, see if you can guess who this is. (:

no prizes though. hahahahaha. :D and donn and the other person... please dont kill me! hahahaha.

GOOD DAY! :D

lacking compassion

2006-05-14T04:11:00.000+08:00

okay. im in the least compassionate of moods right now.

i dont know why, but these days it feels i have a million people talking to me online and stuff. it is actually quite annoying considering how im trying to do something on the other side of my lappy and here you are demanding i entertain you. and just cause i seem nocturnal doesnt mean i dont sleep at all. like... puhhleease! okay, i dont know what's sooo fun about talking to me, considering for a long part of a convo im just saying phrases such as... 'haha, okay.' or 'hmmm, okay.' or 'oh okay' or 'okay cool' or 'wtf? haha.', etc. like... booooringgg! there is a box that has been invented over a decade or two ago called the 'television'. and of course i couldnt tell you to fuck off cause it's just dead rude and im not driven to the point that i'd tell you to, yet. the weirdest part is sometimes people ask me stupid questions on photography and other weird redundant questions. there's google, yahoo, msn.com, etc. on the internet for you all to source out your answers. im not much of a photographer or whatever you perceive me to be. and if you wanna know so much 'how i am', why dont you just come to my blog everyday and see what i say on it. i update on a more or less daily basis and im usually honest on my blog. dont worry, im not pin-pointing anyone right now. cause there are a few whom i do bother to go ahead and drop a 'hello!' on. i do appreciate the occasional sweet message that show you still care about how i am and all, though we've not been talking so often recently. and if i happen to always participate actively in your window (as in the conversation has 5 words or more in most sentences instead of 'haha's and 'oh okay's and the other examples i've given as mentioned just now), it means that i enjoy talking/like you... ~~or maybe it's just your lucky day.~~

another thing i'd like to vent out now is how secondary school kids are getting more and more immatured. yes, generalising is a bad thing and i do have a handful of friends who seem fine, but for the rest of you squirts, it's like... omg! JUST GET A LIFE ALRDY, KIDS. i dont blame you guys entirely for being so... superficial actually. like how you choose your friends and all based on how "cool" they are. i guess it's pretty much the longing you get in those adolescent years and crap like that. "ooh, my friend has piercings all over his face, it's damn cool. im thinking of getting a few myself!" or "hey, you know so-and-so? that is so cool lah!" or "my friend is in a band, i must support him and be all scene like that." or "my boyfriend plays guitar/drums/bass/sings in that band and he is soo cute lah.", etc. firstly, what is it about you that you dislike sooo much your friends and all are so much hang-out worthy and you're not? oh wait, maybe cause you're so shallow and superficial that everyone else who looks "cool" and "scene" like that is worth more attention than you'll ever be. like... since when you became a shadow? ha. and what's up with controversey and all anyway? you see gay boys/girls here and there and you think it's cool?! so you make out with your best friend saying you two love each other and it's right to act all lesbian? erm... hello, earth to attentionwhore? you're not gay, so kissing (not even making out!) your best friend isnt a turn on or sexy at all. and since when being gay was ever really sexy and all anyway? it's such a novelty now, you can hardly tell if a person is really bi, or not sure, gay, straight. okay, i understand, it's that whole phase you go thru in sec school right? it's called puberty, you n00b. everyone grows out of it, so if you think it's cool to stand out/act "older" than you are, wake up now if you think all the stuff you do, is what the older "cooler" people are engaging in. you're just part of another trend. how cool is that? just concentrate on studying hard for once!

i do not appreciate comments on this post. i am merely venting and letting off some steam as usual. cause it always feels like im being heard here, though i dont exactly know who listens and who doesnt. you may have some really unhappy things to say... esp if you're one of those secondary school n00bs. but as i said before... i was generalising, and there are a handful of people who are more or less okay or have grown out of that stupid phase. if you want to object to this post, then i guess you're really guilty of being a n00b and yes, you're not really cool at all. but really, thanks for being sooo concerned about what i think. haha. you really do suck.

you can be non-conforming too, if you looked just like me.

if i was queen of this night, you could become my king.

2006-05-14T00:18:00.000+08:00

yea, vertical rush was good. though i think i like surreal better. and yes, ashley SAN DOOKZXZ took that cool picture of me having ice cream, ~~though i think i look like a retard when i eat~~. didnt get to buy any vr tees. ): and i had carls junior dinner with ash. yayza! it was quite filling i must say. and ash thinks i eat quite a lot and quite fast for a girl. HAHA. sometimes i think im meant to be a guy. fuck tup lah. hahahaha. okay no. anyways, tmr is mother's day. and there's no point trying to get anything for my mom cause she doesnt really want anything from us, and it's always super hard to get my mom presents, and now that she owns a flower shop, it's even harder to get her anything at all! /: geees. so yea, i shall make her a card later or smth. right now... i really have nothing more to say. so yea. byebye!

and i hope your majesty that you like your position

esplanade

2006-05-13T01:54:00.000+08:00

okay, not really. i just wanted to put a pic up lah. haha. went for the surreal and ~~vertical rush~~ gig today at the esplande, but vertical rush got cancelled today. so tmr! :D yayza! for second chances. yup. and im damn lazy to type stuffs out... not like i have much to say today anyways, considering it is actually another dumb public holiday and there's like hardly anything to do! 'cept go for a gig of course. heh. feels so saturday lah, sorta? yea. well surreal was great as usual. I LIKE THE PROPOSAL SONG BEST, ELIAS- YOU FLUMP! so yea. HEHEZXZXZX <-- hahahaha. okay, yea. and i still dont feel like typing soo much. so i shall have one more pic which i took last week on sunday evening. (:

dont even try stealing it, cause it's been water marked by me. nyeh!

and i'll be cathing vertical rush tmr with ash. yay, vr! :D well, good night!

hold on. STUPID BLOGGER.

2006-05-11T23:04:00.000+08:00

okay, like seriously, one of he most annoying things in life is typing something damn long out and then clicking 'publish' but the stupid server or host you use sucks and doesnt save your work. DAMN ITTTTT!!! im now considering switching to livejournal or diary-x or smth else instead of stooooopid blogger.

okay, but i feel ten times better after typing all that out and clicking send, ~~despite my misfortune~~. ): i shall then summarize... no, actually i wont. cause even my summary has too much to say. so yea, the only thing that really makes me feel uber moody now, is the fact that i still dont have my PAOPAOCHA! hahahahaha. i want a strawberry ice blended, i dont care how gay it is cause colin and kero always indulge in it. hahahahhahahaha. ~~I WANT A GHEY PAOPAOCHA!~~

ugh. /:

i had a habit of dying.

heart is on the floor

2006-05-10T22:56:00.000+08:00

im feeling all woozy now.

tmr there's another UT to do. lucky for me, it's definitely not math or science. i actually hope we shuffle groups tmr for enterprise. ugh. complicated why so. and im hoping tmr will be a good day. cause im certainly having the stupid mid week blues, but i cant stand the fact that friday is a public holiday AGAIN. ugh. my stupid internet connection at home sucks today. stupid stupid STUPID shit. oh look, dc again! dumb shit. okay, im just moody pissy grumpy me. GAH! and i promise NOTHING can cheer me up at this point of time. cause im just too pissy. oh yea, and i have to go back to ij tmr to get my olevel cert during my lunch. woodlands is really kinda far from toa payoh. sigh. fuck tuppp. and i just dont have anyone to complain to... or at least right now im just keeping it inside cause i think it's stupid to type it alllll out here for people to read. yea, i just gotta let the world know im all pissy today.

well, i hope your week isnt shit like mine.

rocks tonic juice magic
heart is on the floor, why dont you just step on it?
when i think of all the things you've done.
-saves the day

im feeling emo, but im not emo. so just fuck off!

TWO As SO FAR! :D

2006-05-08T23:34:00.000+08:00

neeenawrrrr.

yes hello. today was pretty weird. in the morning i felt grumpy cause i had to rush out and i forgot my socks, so i was too lazy to go to my room to get it, and wore slippers instead. my allowance wasnt settled properly either. sheesh! so yea. reached the mrt pretty late, plus, donn decided not to come to school since she was late. donn, you really gotta wake yourself up and get your act together now please! ): yea, felt kinda crummy till like 9.30am. cause when i opened my LEO (some funky RP online thing to check my daily grades and assignments, etc.), i found out i got an A on my communications for last week. ((((: yes, my first A! :D well, was pretty euphoric for like a few hours till i had a crap lunch. cause my sore throat hurts like bitch when i eat anything spicy. haha, yes, serves me right for being sooo stewwwpitt, right? sorry lah. gees. we had to sign up for our orientation prog during lunch break today. and the stupid lian sitting behind the lappy couldnt pronounce my name right. what nitaliawhatwhatWHAT?! stupid bitch. anyways! yea, was pretty okay in class before the lecturer took like extra half an hour break for herself. ~~in fact i was a bit mad and fell off my chair while pretending to be a bat, cause they insisted on turning the lights in class off, i felt like i was in some cave. HAHAHAHA. shut up.~~ yea, then the presentation was fucking crap and finally we got to leave! YAYZA. but i had to stay back for rp's art school first year students mentorship programme. it's actually a production of a play. from script writing to producing to performing. i dont know yet what i'll be doing specifically, but we all get a chance, it kinda helps you build your portfolio. the timetable is quite tight. and i'll be staying back in school for like practically this whole week till about 7 or 7.30pm. yup, so i've committed myself to this for the next three months. (: oh yea, and just so you know, it will actually be performed at the Singapore Art Museum, Woodlands CC and RP itself.

met chris and shaun and headed to the library. we were slightly late, and this time it wasnt my fault. haha. honestly, i think people in the art/design school (at rp and where ever) are just damn mad or damn enthu. i dont think im rather enthu, due to my introvertness (if there's such a word). so basically i stuck to chris, shaun and chris's classmate, amir, the whole time. and i did realise that i have to go thru the whole "make new friends" thing again. ~~yes, more funky names that i cannot remember! /:~~ it was kinda interesting actually... meeting cheng, our facil for scriptwriting. what outlandish roly-poly apples, chlorophyllic piles of iparella, grumpy red mullet all. hahaha. there was this whole list of things describing a market in Ueno, Japan. yup and then we had to describe a picture we had in our minds, like it was talking to us. pretty interesting. and i think i shall put it up here. it's worth sharing i guess?

In this one you are standing with your left hand on your lower back, with your head held up towards the sky and your legs wide apart and your body arched back, your right hand is the stand for your microphone as you sing your lungs out. Each bead of perspiration that lines your forehead glistens as the red and violet spotlights fix themselves on centre stage. I cannot tell if the flashes I had seen were from other photographers or merely childhood memories. The crowd is at your feet like a sea of rioters punching the air and screaming every lyric that falls from your lips and caressed by your voice, all participating to grace your swansong, before you take flight to where the Aborigines are natives and the silhouette of a kangaroo salutes the largest island on our blue planet.

yea, well the pic is of nigel at the doubleyellowline gig. it was one of his last gigs with 4th avenue held at the youth park on 19th nov 2005. yes, i still remember the date and all. cause as he was proclaiming to everyone on his msn nickname, "an unforgettable gig!". anyways, nigelly, (: if you happen to read this, please know we cant wait till july when you come back. :D i miss you!

that's about it for today. tmr there's science UT. and i havent studied jack. /: i only can hope i wake on time and that the test wont be too difficult. though i think it's open book? hmmm. well, good night, everyone! tmr's another long day with my mentorship prog and all.

btw, i scored another A for enterprise! (: that's TWO As on that week for me. :D heh heh!

nora + ally = i miss! ):

2006-05-07T01:43:00.000+08:00

nora and ally.

just look at ally's face. HAHA!

anyways, i miss you both very very much. (:

proper update

2006-05-05T21:07:00.000+08:00

yes, im blogging again. yes, im bored again. yes, i find blogging therapeautic.
well, sort of...

ANYWAYS. today was and is still totally shitty (refer to prev post). my throat is still hurting and as sore as how it was since 11am. i have no idea hwo a sore throat could creep up on me like that. oh well, sucks lah. i have done everything in my power to soothe an get rid of my sore throat, except indulge in an after-dinner chocolate fudge cake. yes, i know, so much for drinking gallons of water and gargling my mouth with warm salt water. but i needed to have a slice so so sooo badly, ~~though i had like two slices last night~~. and it felt good on my throat too, it was so smooth and not too rich as it slid down my gullet. fwaaaaaa. yes, i was having a chocolate orgasm for like five minutes. so like now that temporary high is gone, im just sitting here wondering what the fuck to do on a friday evening on my own. i dont know why, but i just wanted to be alone today. /: elias, cc, heider and gang are out now at esplanade hanging out or smth. while i sit here thinking about the last two months or so of my life. and i realise i havent actually said much/summarized it all properly. so yea, here goes nothing...

school + social life
im getting used to school, though i dislike a certain someone that i have to see on thursdays/fridays due to being forced into a team with him. and i dont like doing math or science in poly cause it's a fucking joke and the teachers are not nice. i realise i dont really like the female teachers in my school. i like doing enterprise skills best cause i understand the teacher and it's pretty easy and would sorta help me out in future. SORTA. so yea. oh, and the dude never gives me Cs, not yet at least. so yea. it's coolza. :D i made quite a few friends, though most of them are merely accquaintances/class colleagues. yes... class colleagues. cause we only work together in teams on certain days in class. nyehh. i've realised what weird people there are in this world ever since rp. and though some of them are alright and sorta cute, there are just those like "chevyyy" who really knows how to take the piss and shove it up yours. oh yea, and whenever you smoke in the stairs, there's a friggin annoying announcement that goes on for at least ten minutes telling you not to smoke. and it doesnt just say, 'please do not smoke on the campus'. it's a bloody long national day message telling you not to harm the environment and keeping it clean and i dunno what the fuck else! gawwwd. but overall, im glad donn's in the same school, and ash too. and yes chris, im glad i've met you too, but it's mainly cause i know ash lah. AND I KNOW YOU READ MY BLOG, SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL TAG. haha. i havent seen ally for quite a while actually. okay, i saw her a week ago, but it's not like we hang out that often anymore. so yea. phooey. i wonder how it's like over at green... how is claire and nicole, tessa, hetts, josh, kkb, shaun, etc., etc. well, i miss you all.

home
things are okay, im not sure what's been up with my parents or anything, cause i come home at around 5.30pm - 6pm everyday after school. and i spend most of my time locked up in my room and doing stuffssss on my lappy. like right now. but seriously, there's nothing to do in my house. and im not helping out in the shop, cause i just feel weird around the employees. okay, i still have that weird problem of feeling comfortable around people i dont know and stuff. gah!

my "love" life
it's pretty non-existent if you noticed. there are no more sad or extremely cheerful song lyrics on my blog. things have happened in such a short time, unfortunately things died out quite fast too. up till now, im not really sure if i did the right thing. but im positive whatever has been done will blow over on the other party's part... cause that's how it always is isnt it? yup, so i guess as long as he's fine and im managing, it will be okay. i doubt im being missed anyways. and i noticed everyone has been breaking up or smth recently, what's up with that? donn and i actually made a song out of it. 'tis the season to be single! falalalalalalalala!. yea, lame i know, but we do funky things in school when we're together alone. wootwoot. HAHA. so yea. nyehh. the rest of it is just a secret (and im NOT referring to donn now).

her black despondency + band matters
well, bryan is resigning as rhythm guitarist. so we will be looking out for a new one. and i dont care if mr ee himself reads this but i think it was pretty inconsiderate of him to not tell us personally he wanted out of the band. just look at his stupid msn nickname. like helloooo? you could just tell us or smth instead of letting us discover it for ourselves. /: what if we all didnt have internet or we didnt see you come online? have you left your brain somewhere else ~~again~~? like srsly. GROW UP!!!!!! and im actually thinking of an indie band. ALLY, HETTS, WHERE THE HELL ARE BOTH OF YOU? oh yea, i remember our problem... DRUMMER. ugh. so yea, we're as good as non-existent. and honestly, im not really interested in forming a band with people im not that close to... ~~like my classmates who are begging me to be bassist~~. but really, i just dont think i could form a band with people of too different opinions and all, and we still dont have a drummer anyway. gees. /:

personal asssignments/portfolio building
i've joined his mentorship programme in school that is for all first year students in the school of technology and arts (STA)... or smth technology with arts dunnowhat lah. it's actually a production for a play. so we'll be doing stuff like script writing, performing, sound, stage management, lighting, etc. and im pretty excited about it cause it's gonna be for like three months and after school on most weekdays. so i wont be so bored, plus i get to meet more people who are in the STA. (: so far i know chris, shaun and bird have signed up. so yea, yay! i know peoples. yup. i havent been taking many photos recently for gigs or anything, apart from random snapshots that are not gallery worthy at all. cause paul and elias have been pretty busy with their own stuff (paul = potential sg idol, elias = potential o'level 6 pointer). so yea, through the discord hasnt been gigging and that means, im a starving artist. well, sorta. BUT i have more jobs now! haha. okay, it's more like i've been recently recruited as bismuth's photographer too by chris. (: so for any upcoming bismuth shows, i'll be there. im only a novice at photography, so i just hope to do a lot better than expected. and im actually thinking of giving up bass to get a camera and do a short course or smth. /: well, yea... i just really wanna do better in design and stuff better than any design student where ever they would be from. donn if you read this, that includes you too! haha. honestly, though i take lots of band pics, i actually prefer taking skylines, sunsets, scenery and things with concepts in them. rather than miscellaneous objects or things like that. so i guess im planning to take a trip down/up to somewhere soon to take some good photos with the nikon. and if i went to arab street again, IM DEFINITELY BRINGING MY NIKON and going before it gets dark. anyone interested in accompanying me? call me!

things im looking forward to this month:
more band photography... i hope, im actually not sure.
going to bintan on the 25th! i get to take more photos. (:
engaging in more photography and going on my own little "expeditions".
mentorship programme in school.
getting As in classes. HAHA!
my sore throat to go away.
gigs gigs gigs.
jamming with the band again.

yup, okay. that's all for now, and im pretty amazed and grateful if you came to read this entry up till here. lol. so if you did just read my whole line of ramblings, please do tag my board and tell me so, i'll really really appreciate knowing you gave so much a damn about me, though im this insignificant. haha. (:

<33

see. i feel better already! :D

boring class.

2006-05-05T13:13:00.000+08:00

ripped this off a friendster bulletin.

FIVE THINGS YOU DID IN SECONDARY SCHOOL?
. studying
. wasting my life
. ponning classes
. seeing my friends
. cake fights

FIVE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SINGERS/BANDS?
. eighteen visions
. funeral for a friend
. atreyu
. scary kids scaring kids
. secondhand serenade

FIVE THINGS YOU WOULD DO IF YOU WERE A MILLIONAIRE
. pig out
. redecorate/furnish my room
. get a new bass
. fix my phone
. buy more clothes and shoes

FIVE BAD HABITS
. my stupid twitching
. my eating habits
. sleeping late
. too much internet
. going into my own world

FIVE THINGS YOU LIKE DOING
. designing
. photography
. hanging out with friends
. reading my books
. playing the bass

FIVE THINGS YOU WILL NEVER WEAR, BUY OR GET
. yellow clothes
. orange clothes
. streetwear rubbish
. those gross ah beng tees
. those studded jackets skinheads wear

FIVE FAVOURITE THINGS
. photoshop
. my cameras
. my phone
. music i listen to
. assorted stationery

and yes, im in school supposedly having class. my throat hurts like fuck, i dunno why. causse i always drink plenty of water. and i have a fucking ulcer under my tongue. i hope it doesnt grow any bigger. anyways, im so tired and we're doing science today. it fucking sucks lah. and chev is being so fucking gay. he's been throwing tantrums in class and all a lot, cause we all are just damn annoyed and disgusted by him. you have no idea why so. gawwd, such a pussy. i cant wait for today's class to end! and im just gonna stay home this weekend i guess, since im in such a bad mood. i seriously dont believe that today go from suckfest to hell. it started out by raining lah. cb. i hate rain. and science. and yes, i dislike chev very very very much. CB.

hurt.

2006-05-04T20:43:00.000+08:00

WHEN DONN DOES NOT COME TO SCHOOL, I FEEL SAD AND UN-MAGICAL. ):

yup, today i was pretty lonely in school without donn. as i said, everyone else has made friends or smth alrdy. i made friends too... but they're not in my class. -__-" like what's the point then right? heh. yea, so like i had lunch with chris and his friends. i kinda felt a little out cause they're all his classmates. luckily i didnt need to really talk to them much. yes, i suck at this making friends thing no matter how nice people can be. /: sheeeesh. the mock UT today was alright i guess, i was halfway through the last question when my time was up. like whoopee. tmr we have basic science. i HATE science. and partly cause the teacher sucks shit ~~or maybe her own tits, that's why they are so saggy, like ewwwza! (haha)~~. yea. i doubt i'll ever get an A for science cause stupid "chevyyy" is in my group and we all just cant get along with him. and that tommy keeps making fun of me and him. not like there's any nat + chevalier. yes, his name is CHEVALIER. okay, i feel quite bad typing all this out. cause like there's a chance he might read it somehow... well, it's a slim chance anyway. cause in class, only bird knows my blog addy. and remember my francine pascal series? yes, im still in the middle of vol. 20! which is amazing, cause i usually finish one volume in like a day. i guess school and all that travelling takes up huge chunks of your time. oh well. i could read during the time taken to travel, but im either just too sleepy or lazy to get it out of my bag. so yes, im still trying to finish this book and get on with the next few in the series. haha. and omg, it's just so sad lah, the way everything in the book seems. OKAY, enough about my book. this isnt a book review or anything like a book report. heh. righttt. sigh... im alrdy dreading the thought of school tmr, i hope donn is on time/early, so we can walk to school together and all again. i feel as if i havent seen her in a longgg time. hahahahaha. okay, i saw her like yesterday. but it still feels weird okay. and i realise my blog entries are pretty long. so i shall stop now. not like i have anymore to talk about. i guess im trying to tear myself away from all the fuckshit i constantly think about. and being really tired/sleepy today doesnt make it any better. ):

btw, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM. though i hope you never ever ever read this.

i detach myself again- it's better this way.

anti-boys!

2006-05-03T23:13:00.000+08:00

yes, donn and i, are officially anti-boys! ~~okay, not quite.~~ BUT YEA. BOYS ARE STUPID, AND YOU SHOULD THROW ROCKS AT THEM! it is the right thing to do! :D

who would want faces like these anyway? kuku.

tomorrow's the mock understanding test (UT). I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE FUN BEING ON TIME. ugh!

oh yea, and i caught the clock running at 11.11 again! like just. yayza! im lucky! (: i hope.

inspired

2006-05-03T00:25:00.000+08:00

i choke back each tear that bleeds
-august in bethany-

fuck, everytime i listen to that song, it reminds me of that ~~stupid slutbaghoe~~. ):

anyways, recently, i've been inspired. (: in fact, i've been quite motivated suddenly somehow to want to do well in something. im not sure what, but today in class was a start. i actually wanted to do well for the communications module. like actually aimed for an A. and i think i put 101% in today's stuff. hahaha. ~~only 101% cause i kinda got tired along the way.~~ i was so determined, i promise! i think i deserve at least a B. (: yup. cause i practically did everything for my group and presented more stuff than any of them. partly cause i really do want that A ~~and partly cause they were so clueless on what to do. /:~~ lol. well, tmr's another chance for me to get an A. haha! and gawwwd, i know this sounds damn gay (like something you'd get off http://colinandkero.blogspot.com), but i desperately want an strawberry ice blended! yes, with those "pearls". haha. (: im just uber thirsty now, i swear. and i dunno why, but i want something fruity but just not apple or stupid orange, and im kinda tired of other citrus flavours like lime and lemon. so yea, something with berry in it. :D okay, imma thirsty derranged nat. /: but hell! i really want that ice blended! lol. apparently they sell it in school, i think it's at the cafe... which is always sofa king packed with kids, you'd just give up after five minutes into the queue. lol. i'll try during lunch, when i have like two and a half hours to line up... well, sorta. /: okay, yup. that's about it. oh, and i would appreciate models actually, if you think you're pretty/delicate/sensual-yet-broken-looking enough for a picture, no experience whatsoever needed. (: cause i would really love you to help me out a bit. and i wouldnt be hogging the camera all the time too. haha. (:

well, that's about it, it's almost 1am, i needa sleeeep! more A's to ~~conquer~~!
i mean... earn. lol. (: BYEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

labour day

2006-05-01T21:14:00.000+08:00

i dont like labour day.
okay, i dont really enjoy public holidays in general, they are uber boring and like the whole family is home. but of course i love christmas and i sort of like good friday, apart from the fasting bit though. so yea, the sticker party at home club last night was okay though it was kinda dead. went home around 2am dreading the thought of my dad giving me another lecture, only to find my whole family was fast asleep alrdy. pfffffft. slept at like 5am after a longgg catch up talk with paul,
who is still just as spastic and disgusting. haha. yea, and so i didnt go to sentosa with my classmates cause i woke up at like 3.30pm anyway.

so yea, back to school tmr. im actually quite happy i have school to go to, instead of wasting my life away like i would probably do. this week there's like a stupid mock understanding test thing. ugh. how annoying. it's not relevant to my course at all, but we still got to do it. and the best part is, i have no idea how to study for it. haha. oh well, i hate rp's curriculum. /: i wanna get a job at the night safari though. cause it'll be in the evening and i really think i could use a job right now. esp since i dont have homework or really huge difficult tests. cause i doubt i can do waiting. well, i actually told my dad about the night safari job, he didnt seem to object, he only asked how often i had to work. hmmm. so yea, im really considering working at there part time.

and i cannot wait till 25th of this month! (: im going to bintan! yayyy! :D this is like the first time in such a long while im really happy im going overseas. haha. i just hope it doesnt rain, cause bintan seems to rain a lot from my past experience there. i'll be going with some of my family from my mom's side. so yea, i'll probably have to end up babysitting though. /: but my mom says i can bring the slr along to take photos, so im really really looking forward to that. (: yup. i just love beaches, though i think i look weird with a tan. heh.

yea, i put that poster up to advertise for elias's and jem's band. go okay? (:

well, that's all for now, this month really really seems to be looking good. :D

donn - andy =
2006-04-30T02:49:00.000+08:00
this is a huge joke.

i feel sad... and it's not cause my own problems have made me feel this way, but because of other people's pain. okay, i know im such a loser cause i feel so sorry for other people that i cant help but cry. seriously i wish i could detach myself from all this, cause it really is damn stupid. i cant understand why im always so sensitive to all the touchytouchy shit. ugh, im such a sucker.

anyways, donn, i love you and i hope you are okay. please dont do anything stupid to hurt yourself or anything. im here and you know that. no matter what time you wanna call me, im gonna be here to listen. i'll see you on tuesday in school and i'll do my best to make you happy k? just please dont hurt yourself. what you did wasnt wrong. and i know your reasons and intentions were all right. im here for you. please take care of yourself over the weekend.

andy, please please PLEASE dont do anything stupid. im begging you to be careful and not hurt yourself. im here for you too. we (your friends) are all here for you. and it's not your fault this all happened okay? so dont blame yourself. please keep you head straight, and i hope you still remember what i told you before. if you need to talk, i'll listen.

okay, i feel better. sort of.

project green grass.

2006-04-29T23:59:00.002+08:00

yes hello. i went for project green grass today with the usual peoples.
and met some old friends there too. (:
bands that performed: a vacant affair, electrico, surreal, west grand boulevard and vertical rush.

a vacant affair. (:

ally! :D

sherri!

nikki!

hetts!

surreal!

that's tiantian being body surfed! HAHA!

yup. that's about it.
more photos linked under "latest photos", album: project green grass. (:

sorry i didnt take many many of like the other bands,
surreal seemed to be the most happening, though the others were great too,
like ava. hahahahhaha. (:

goodbye jem.

2006-04-29T01:02:00.000+08:00

as much as i dont wanna be with you anymore, i miss you.
and that is a hell lot to keep this open wound unhealing.

11.11 wishes

2006-04-27T01:53:00.000+08:00

hmm okay, im feeling upset, and im not quite sure why. okay, i do know why, but it's not like im going to let the whole world know so. ugh. i made an 11.11 wish. (: so im hoping that it will come true. i guess i miss some things i used to have so often. for instance, today made me realise i do miss paul. even though he annoys the fuck out of me sometimes, he was always there to listen. now im not gonna talk to him as much anymore, and we'll start seeing him live on channel five once or twice a week. stupid idol. somehow i just find it so fake, and i hope that he's not making the wrong choice in joining in and all. look at taufik, he's some seven eleven spokesperson. -__-" so much for being an idol. yea, and though things in school seem to get better, i just feel like a loser still. cause i just cant fit in properly with anyone else apart from my old school friends, and even my classmate asked me why dont i hang out with them and all. i mean... i just cant. i find it so hard to open myself up to a group of people, to be able to walk next to a person and not feel inferior. seriously, i just suck so much at this socializing thing. how the hell does donn do it sometimes, is amazing. and though i do try, i just end up feeling damn stupid or like i did something wrong in front of people or smth. meeting one person at a time is alright, but i always worry like a russian that i'd seem boring and people will think im weird. fuck, im just so self conscious like that! anyways, things outside of school are not getting better, so yea, i actually enjoy going to stinking rp everyday, cause it takes my mind off other stuff with the really boring and painfully long classes i have to sit through everyday. and that reminds me... that annoying fuckhead boy is gonna be in my group again since it's science! ): PLEASE SPARE ME. this thursday does not look great. ):

please may my 11.11 wish come true!
im due for a miracle, im waiting for a sign.

paul's sg idol thing!

2006-04-27T00:01:00.000+08:00

okay, i got bored and did this collage. haha.

yes! i have finally made a new friend in school, (:
and hung out with him and donn for lunch.
he also happens to be claire's cousin, shaun.

went to mediacorp today for paul's idol performance thingy.

^the obnoxious and annoying dude.

^that camera is just scary lah.

^randy and his artpiece. i took that photo though. (:

^daniel ong and gurmit singh

^yay, go paulie! haha. :D

^the guy in white's name is janson, he's kinda cute. HAHA.

^the guy in the dark red jacket is damn good too lah.

^the grumpy dude judge guy, ken lim.

wasnt supp to take photos in there, but i got these anyway. heh.
paul sang 'here without you' by three doors down.
it was fucking moving lah! someone actually cried, while i had a million goosebumps.
haha. and honestly, paul was like the best in the competition!
okay fine, there was some other guy who was damn good too,
and i hope very much both paul and him would get into the next round.
i think his name is jonathan leong. yup. really good singer too.
so everyone, please... VOTE FOR PAUL!

quote of the day: two legs good, four legs better!
-gurmit singh

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

ever so sweet.

2006-04-25T19:58:00.000+08:00

my brother is a fucking idiot germ spreader!
okay, at least that's what i think.
i practically die in class when i forget my water bottle,
and my maid has to give it to my stupid brother to use it!
now i dont think i ever want to use it again,
though i like it so much. ):
i feel super pissed and sad at the same time,
cause i bet my bottle has a million scratches on it right now.
my brother: destroyer of all things pretty. ):
and he does NOT look like me please,
unless you hate me that much to want to make me sound that ugly. ))):

CHRISTOPHER (ANDREW) HO SHEN ANN, YOU SUCK, ~~BUT IM STILL SO NICE TO YOU!~~ ):

ugh! okay, enough venting.
i was actually in a good mood throughout the day... AGAIN!

since i got to school actually. hahaha.
OKAY. I DONT KNOW WHAT MY PROBLEM IS! HAHAHA!
but yea, my team members for today have been looking at me funny
and saying i keep smiling to myself or at my computer or smth. ugh.
~~is it really that obvious?~~
PLEASE MURDER ME BEFORE I DO SMTH INCREDIBLY STEWWWPIT!
haha. i still cannot help laughing.
everything seems too good to be true suddenly.
OKAY, SHUT UP, NAT. NOTHING IN YOUR LIFE TURNS OUT RIGHT,
SO DONT START YOUR STUPID HIGH HOPES AND DUMBNESS ALL OVER AGAIN!
yes, im talking to myself. shut up.
heh.

ever so sweet you baked it in cakes for me.

hahaha. fuck lah!

lao sai!

2006-04-24T23:55:00.000+08:00

hello. despite having such a shitty day, literally shitty,
i cant help but have this stupid happy look on my face right now.
hahahahahaha. :D
PLEASE MAY THE FUCKING FOOD POISONING OR WHATEVER FUCK IT IS GO AWAY!
~~i actually do want to go to school tmr.~~ :X

gawwd, this all gets weirder doesnt it? heh.

eventful weekend in april.

2006-04-23T11:05:00.000+08:00

HELLO EVERYONE!
this has been one helluva busy weekend!
and once again, im too lazy to type the whole thing out,
so i will use pictures too later on.... (:

FIRSTLY!: silhouette clothing is now SEPHIRE CLOTHING (say saf-fire clothing). and i have rejoined andy and company, though avery will not be working with us anymore. ):
do click the banner below to visit our new and improved website done by andypandy.

(yes, i did this banner, with a bit of andy's help.)
and we have a myspace account, so do add us if you have one too. (:

SECONDLY!: i have finally gone and done some shopping, so i feel really satisfied, well, almost. cause i didnt get the black topshop pants due to the lack of moneys. ): and i got to take a few pictures of stuff. though the quality isnt good. due to my lousy 2megapix casio one again. ): but better than nothing, i suppose. anyone feeling generous? ;)

had dinner at phin's steak house (bugis), damn good dinner lah. and it wasnt even that costly. (:
it was drizzling too, so it kinda made the night prettier. though i hate rain.

THIRDLY! (gee, this is getting tiring, haha): we all went to arab street again last night. and honestly, im actually quite bored of arab street's sheesha. haha. but nobody could come up with a better place to chill so yea, arab street.

hahaha.

LASTLY!: i just have to put these pictures up...

hahahahaha. and it's actually formed by 'hottis' from 7 11. too bad the pictures arent very clear.
so uhh, you can go figure out what's being said on the road, and no, it wasnt my idea! :P

okay, that's all for one entry. (:

two favourites.

2006-04-21T17:43:00.000+08:00

hello! today is a friday, and i have been getting multiple orgasms since school ended. :D
well, not really. (:

anyways, since schoolza is so boring, i will have some erm... NICE pictures up! :D
featuring two people who never fail to make me smile...

1.

2.

1. donn: she's in school taking a photo of something, and everyone who walked past looked down to stare at this small weird girl squatting at the edge of the rp's school canteen today.
2. paul: this is paul as 'pauline'. he has two other personalities/alter-egos. his other alter-ego apart from 'pauline' is 'andre', who aparently is a 5-7 year old kid. he'd tell you he's talking about his nephew, but honestly, it really is paul being childish and silly... as usual, but to a greater extent. catch him on singapore idol!

what do they have in common?:
they both dont care how stupid they look in public/in front of people. HAHA! :D

love you both. (:

I AM ANNOYED. FUCK OFF, BITCHES.

2006-04-19T22:46:00.000+08:00

OKAY. SERIOUSLY, JUST DONT TALK TO ME ABOUT ANY FUCK SHIT.
I DONT WANNA HEAR JACK OR TAKE ANY ADVICE FROM YOU ON ANYTHING,
AND STOP ASKING WHAT IM DOING.
IT'S NOT EVEN IMPORTANT,
CAUSE THERE'S HARDLY ANYTHING TO DO ONLINE ANYWAYS.
USE YOUR BRAINS, YOU DUMB CUNTS.
AND PLEASE AH, SHUT YOUR FUCKING TRAP UP IF YOU DONT KNOW ME WELL ENOUGH.
CAUSE IM NOT SITTING AROUND AND LISTENING TO ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT I SHOULD/SHOULDNT DO.
I DONT CARE. WHY CANT YOU GUYS GET THAT?
EVERYTHING IS JUST NOT MOVING,
EVERYTHING IS JUST SO BORING AND MUNDANE,
THERE'S NOTHING TO TALK TO ME OR ASK ME ABOUT, SO DONT!
MY LIFE HAS BEEN THE SAME SINCE MID JAN, GET IT?
THE ONLY DIFFERENCE NOW IS THAT I HAVE SCHOOL.
AND I DONT ENJOY IT, SO DONT ASK.
CAUSE I'VE EXPLAINED A MILLION TIMES TO EVERYONE WHY I DONT LIKE IT.
STUPID SHITHEADS. JUST STOP THE QUESTIONS.
WHY CANT YOU FIGURE STUFF OUT YOURSELVES?
OR WHY DONT YOU JUST READ MY BLOG MORE OFTEN TO KEEP UP WITH MY LIFE?
IT'S A VERY VERY RELIABLE SOURCE TO KNOW HOW I FEEL
AND WHAT I DO ALMOST EVERYDAY.
AND YES, GET THIS INTO YOUR HEAD!:
I DONT WANNA TALK TO ANYONE ABOUT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
CAUSE EVERYTHING IS SCREWY ANYWAYS.
AND I DONT WANNA TELL YOU ANYTHING,
CAUSE YOU ALL WILL PROBABLY SAY IM SUCH A WHINER AND SHIT LIKE THAT.
SO YEA, DONT BLAME ME IF I WANT TO SHUT YOU ALL OUT.
I JUST NEED MY SPACE.
AND I DONT CARE FOR YOUR LONG GRANDMOTHERS STORIES ABOUT HOW GREAT YOU ARE
OR HOW FUCKED UP YOUR DAY IS AND THIS AND THAT.
I MIGHT AS WELL JUST LISTEN TO MYSELF GRUMBLE IF THAT'S THE CASE.
I DONT FEEL IMMENSE SADNESS OR HAPPINESS ANYMORE,
CAUSE I DONT FEEL LIKE THERE'S ANYTHING NOR ANYONE TO FEEL FOR ANYWAY.
ALL I FEEL IS FUCKING ANNOYED.

okay, get lost now.

miyavi

2006-04-18T23:07:00.000+08:00

when everything seems sucky and relationships feel fucked up,
there's always an internet search engine to find Miyavi. (((:

yes elias, my pretentious japanese musician...
who is also extremely hawwwt! :D

second day.

2006-04-18T17:58:00.000+08:00

Rocks Tonic Magic Juice
Let me take this awkward saw,
Run it against your thighs,
Cut some flesh away.
I'll carry this piece of you with me.
I'ts all I can say tonight
Is I hate you,
But it would be all right.
We could see each other sometime,
If I could somehow make you mine.

And if not I'll take my spoons,
Dig out your ~~blue~~ eyes,
Swallow them down to my colon.
They're gonna burn like hell tonight.
Cause you're beautiful, just not on the inside.
Light comes from within.
Your beaming eyes don't seem so bright.

Heart is on the floor,
Why don't you step on it?
When I think of all the things you've done.
Heart is on the floor,
Why don't you step on it?
When I think of all the things you've done.

Boardwalks and breaking waves,
Made our Saturdays.
I'd buy you lemonade right now, if you were here.
Then I'd throw it in your face,
And I'd listen to you cry.
Remember how I miss, our nights under the ocean skies.

Heart is on the floor,
Why don't you step on it?
When I think of all the things you've done.
Heart is on the floor,
Why don't you step on it?
When I think of all the things you've done.

You and I are like when fire and the ocean floor collide.
You and I are like when fire and the ocean floor collide.
You and I are like when fire and the ocean floor collide.
You and I are like when fire and the ocean floor collide.

-Saves The Day

okay, apart from letting something/one get to me, today was not bad. school was much much better than yesterday, the enterprising shit has to be my favourite module... so far. i have a bad feeling about the math and computing one though. however, i have a bad feeling my grades wouldnt be so fantastic, cause im not that participative in class. ): well, i cant exactly help it, im just not used to the people around me and doing presentations everyday. but i love how the breaks are like! haha.

this is my regular everyday timetable...
8.30am - start class according to what module it is.
9.30am - break!
(though some time is used to discuss/brainstorm about the problem statement given per day)
10.30am - back to class to work on project and presentation.
11.30am - lunch break
(though sometime is used to complete our presentations)
2pm - back to class to do our group presentation.
4pm - BYEBYE CLASS!

but of course school doesnt always end on time,
it also depends on how long the presentations and q&a sessions take.
and how long we take to do our daily quiz, peer/self evaluation and reflective journals (rj).
the process can be quite gruelling as the teacher (or 'facilitator' as they call it in rp -__-"),
can be uber longggg-windedddddd. ):
and i really really really mean UBER long-winded!

yea, but overall, i dont mind the timetables being like that,
i just hate the boring shits we do the whole day.

well, no pictures today lah. couldnt be bothered.
tmr we're doing basic sciences (biology stuff).
ugh. so secondary school! ))):

nyehh. BYE.

first day of schoolza ):

2006-04-17T19:00:00.000+08:00

yes! nat needs a hug! ):
i dislike school a lot. )):
i depise rain even more. ))):

JUST LOOK AT THAT GLOOMINESS OF A MONDAY!
~~and yes, the bad black and white photos were intended. >:(~~

bea was my only consolation, cause we braved the crappy weather together.
and no, we didnt take a cab there.
dont know where donn disappeared to after smoking with andy, eugene and pantat though. /:
my head hurts like bitch now. stupid rain water! ):

one word to describe today: SHITPISSCUNTFUCK!

monster mash, etc etc.

2006-04-16T14:08:00.000+08:00

take a look at this video i personally uploaded please.

sometimes, i look at these things, and i wonder how paul is my friend. haha!

hmm. sorry, im just lazy to type these things out.
but just a summary...
monster mash at ij studios -> clarke quay.
haha. yes, it's only one line. aiya, lazy lah!

anyways, more photos linked under "latest photos".
album 150406.

vulnerable

2006-04-15T03:58:00.000+08:00

VULNERABLE

Share with me the blankets that you're wrapped in
because its cold outside cold outside, its cold outside
share with me the secrets that you kept in
because its cold inside cold inside, its cold inside

and your slowly shaking finger tips
shows that you're scared like me
so let pretend were alone
and I know you may be scared
and I know were unprepared
but I don’t care

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
please don’t tell me that I am the only one that’s vulnerable
impossible

I was born to tell you ~~'I love you'~~
isn't that a song already
I get a B in originality
and it's true I cant go on without you
your smile makes me see clear
if you could only see in the mirror what I see

and you're slowly shaking finger tips
shows that you're scared like me
so lets pretend were alone
and I know you may be scared
and I know were unprepared
but I don’t care

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that your so sure
please don’t tell me that I am the only one that’s vulnerable
impossible

slow down ~~girl~~ your not going anywhere
just wait around and see
maybe I am much more, you'd never know what lies ahead
I promise I can be anyone, I can be anything
just because you were hurt doesn’t mean you shouldn’t bleed
I can be anyone anything, I promise I can be what you need

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
please don’t tell me that I am the only one that’s vulnerable
impossible

- Secondhand Serenade

screwy friday lah

2006-04-14T20:46:00.000+08:00

it's been so tiring today. ugh.
things are getting screwy, and my hair really sucks.
so nothing can get anymore screwy,
actually, it can.
damn it.

THANK GOD, i have these two people who understand and help me get through the screw ups.

my own disaster

2006-04-14T12:29:00.000+08:00

YES. I HAVE GONE COMPLETELY INSANE AND DRIVEN TO ULTIMATE BOREDOM!
okay, bottom line is...
I CUT AND BLEACHED MY HAIR AGAIN. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I KNOW MY FRINGE SUCKS,
IT WAS AN EXPERIMENT. HAHA!
I FORGOT I CANT EXPERIMENT STUFF LIKE THAT.
SO NOW I LOOK LIKE A DORK AND I HAVE TO WEAR A CAP MORE OFTEN,
ALL CAUSE OF MY DUMB FRINGE!
!@#)$%^*&(!@(#$%^)&*

anyways, happy good friday.

right.

leons birthday

2006-04-13T02:56:00.000+08:00

wasted a day

2006-04-12T23:52:00.000+08:00

gees. i slept through the whole of today.
so i wasted a day of doing nothing again.
im not telling you guys what time i woke up,
cause you all will probably throw rocks at me
if i told you that i woke up at 7pm today.
whoops! did i just say that? heh.

i have to get so many things done and confirmed by friday evening.
shitshitshit.
and i wasted a day alrdy.
awesome!
i suddenly dont feel like doing anything,
cept maybe just hanging out and eating.
like im not in the mood for going to gigs and stuff.
fuck lah.

i dont have any mood to blog either,
it's just that im so bored. ):

MITCH: hey baby! im sorry i couldnt wake up to meet you! ): im really really sorry!!! maybe some weekend yea? ugh. i feel so bad. but i was just too tired. im sorryyyyyy. ): i still loves you though im a lazy bum.

oh well...
shopping anyone?

orientation day 2

2006-04-11T17:08:00.000+08:00

hello morning, what's the first thing you do when you reach school and see your friend?
take photos of her chest of course! HAHA!

second and last day of orientation.
i now think rp is as exciting as going to a techno club.
but at least i made friends... well, sorta.
they're kinda nice... in a weird way.
and the guy at my table was just too friendly
or maybe im just anti-social like that. ):
and china people are strange. haha.
donn has a china boy in class who carries a chinese/english dictionary around.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

haha. sorry, i couldnt resist.

orientation day 1

2006-04-10T15:50:00.000+08:00

yes, today was first day of orientation.
and it was as fun as watching paint dry.

anyways, im off to go shopping! :D
that is more like it. (:

HAN LWIN OO. HAHA!

2006-04-09T21:51:00.000+08:00

tmr is my orientation at rp.
rp = republic polytechnic = retarded polytechnic
40% of me is dreading the thought of going there with all the bengs and lians and the shit curriculum,
20% is glad i have bea, donn and momo in my course
30% is glad im not like doing biomed or some weird electronics shit in the second year.
5% of me dreads waking up and dragging my ass to woodlands
5% hopes for hot guys to gawk at if i get bored...

40% + 20% + 30% + 5% + 5% = 100% excited and nerve wrecked.

FWAAAA! i purposely slept at 8am today,
so i'd get up at 3pm
and would feel like i need to sleep badly by ten or something,
however, it's 10.15pm already and i feel normal.
shit, i shouldnt have had starbucks today! /:

anyways, im more or less set for school tmr, all i need is my lappy. (:
kewwwlza!

btw, there's a person in my class called... HAN LWIN OO.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

and it's weird, cause i keep seeing 4.44 on the clock or smth,
even the number of pageviews i had was 444. creeps.

wish me luck, cause i need to remember lots of chinese names now. ): die.

arab street again!

2006-04-09T02:21:00.002+08:00

arab street with ashley, cc, john, neek, kim, randy, jem, elias, paul, cyn and edwin was good.

too bad paul and cyn left early. ):

revenge! haha.

2006-04-09T00:40:00.000+08:00

okay donn, now i forgive you.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

paul's kahoonas

2006-04-07T18:23:00.000+08:00

THIS IS PAUL, WITH HIS FRIEND, BEFORE HE HAD HIS LONG MESSY HAIR!
PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO, I GOT IT OFF MAJO'S FRIENDSTER PROFILE.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. PAUL'S KAHOONAS!

and yes, he is the same guy going on tv for singapore idol. HAHA!

suicidegirls

2006-04-07T01:43:00.000+08:00

anna lee and desdemonia have got to be two of the hottest suicidegirls around!
okay, dont ask me why im looking at sucidegirls,
i was simply browsing myspace and came across the suicidegirls account.
anyway, i would die to qualify looking like a suicidegirl.
the keyword is looking, not being one,
cause most of them are hookers and pornstars. /:

hungry nat.

2006-04-07T00:27:00.000+08:00

i think i have a disease;
i cant stop getting hungry!
i think it's cause i always wake up so late these days.
in fact, i just made myself a snack.

and this isnt even everything that i ate.
x:

happy nat

2006-04-06T01:36:00.000+08:00

yes ashes, i said it myself, you can stfu now. hahaha. we're infected by tiantian! /:

HAPPY WEDNESDAY! :D

2006-04-05T22:26:00.000+08:00

yay! i finally figured how to use my laptop to access the internet.
so im extremely pleased with myself. haha!
and things are looking up again. (:
i didnt sleep till like 7 this morning,
so expected i woke up at 6.30pm. lol.
i was uber hungry just now,
and all i had was dinner, peanut butter sandwiches and some stupid instant quaker oat thing.
seriously, the quaker oats are not cool! ugh.
or maybe cause i messed it up. hahahahaha. :p
anyways, it's a lonely evening again,
but it's not like yesterday's reason.
i hope whoever is holding up the wireless network
im connected to wont disconnect the modem or whatsoever.
if not im gonna be uber bored,
cause i doubt i'll be sleeping early today. ):

anyways. im bored. someone talk to me!
and this is super annoying,
i cant see my own blog unless i click "preview" on the edit template page!
stewwwpitzaa. /:

alright, nothing to talk about today at all. (:
and im gonna get two new books to complete my 'fearless series' by francine pascal!
yayza! :D yes, i love this series, you gotta read it to understand why. (:
and with those two new books, i get to continue where i stopped,
so it's not just two new books i get to read, but ten more. (((:

yes, the week is looking up!
i still cant wait till this weekend at arab street though. (:

im saving seats, just in case you change your mind.

2006-04-05T04:43:00.000+08:00

i dunno why, but im already feeling really shitty.
i guess the wednesday "blues" are catching up on me.
but honestly, i think last wednesday would be better than today,
and yet, the day has hardly started.
it's 4.44am on the computer clock.
they say 4's an unlucky number.
and comparing it to how catching the clock running at 11.11 is lucky,
you can definitely say, my luck is non existent
and things are certainly not looking up.

my only comfort and confidante is my mom's camera.

retrace the steps as if we forgot,say you wont care.

day two.

2006-04-05T00:51:00.000+08:00

erm. yea. so it's like tuesday already.
and i guess you can say that im okay.
hung out with drew and honky, ate two dinners. heh.
i really cant wait till the weekend.
i plan not to go out for the rest of the week.
partly cause i wanna save money
and maybe give my dad no reason to nag at me for going out so often.
well, yea, revamped my blog.
nothing really new. but it's more pleasant to look at. i think?

im saving seats for you, just in case you change your mind.

im sorry jem.

2006-04-03T16:29:00.000+08:00

today is a shitful monday. ):
but im so glad i have spastic friends like paul around.
he asked me to watch the two stupidest videos on youtube today.

it has cheered me up tremendously
and is the best thing that happened to me today

so please watch this video here if you feel shitty and regretful... or something.
this is the funnier one.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

i'll be going for penetential service later at holy spirit to confess all my sins.
ugh. i hate going for confession. ):

would you have the strength to stay?

yay sunday.

2006-04-02T21:11:00.000+08:00

im feeling pretty damn tired now.
cause i slept at like 7.30am or something.
stewwwpit andrew emo k-oh/id who likes silverstein can still purposely call me at 11am!
haha. but it's cool cause he likes fairly odd parents,
which everyone else hates/finds irritating. it's cool okay! haha.

elias woke me up at around 3.30pm and asked if i wanted to go out, i was actually too tired to get up at that time. but at 4pm i finally dragged myself out of bed and got dressed to go out. met him and his friend, the new vinyl summer bassist (jeremy), at lido. i kinda took a huge detour cause i wasnt paying attention to where i was walking towards. so yea anyways. elias went to topman to buy jeans, cause jem had wrecked his pants on friday night. haha. and then macs, cause i hadnt eaten at all, fiddled with elias's camera and bluffed terrence over the phone i was gonna sing for vinyl summer when they jammed today. lol. went to borders to look at books and stuff, elias realised he didnt wanna get any books from borders cause they were too ex, so we went to hmv instead. we're probably going to arab street next week on a photography "expedition" (haha) and look at the antique stuff and see what we can get from there. maybe smoke seesha too lah. yay! cant wait. so yea, with elias's efficient camera phone (without a cracked screen like mine), i got these two photos up.

i look like a fucking retard here, cause elias messed up hair up like that and took this. haha.

hello borders, we're two very small people. lol. (:

date movie

2006-04-02T02:08:00.000+08:00

okay, friday night was great.
i didnt get wasted. (:
okay, maybe just a little tipsy, but i was perfectly fine okay.
so ignore what elias and all have to say. yay!
but marjie got preeetty wasted... im sure john had a good time. HAHA.

i got a few photos of friday night here.

~~spotted john and majo? (: perfect. HAHAHAHAHA.~~

anyways, im really really sorry about the poor quality and low resolution shots;
i only have my camera phone.
(OH YEA) which also has a HUGE CRACK on the lcd screen.
WHOOPEEEE.
so i cannot read the first line and one and a half words of the second line in smses.

so please call me if you have something really important
OR type...
<>
<>
<>
-your message here.-
and then press send to me. okay?

then i will be able to read your messages with no frowns and headaches.
ugh. i need to replace it this monday latest or i'd die!

oh, and i watched date movie this evening, it was fucking stupid.
but sorta funny. but still FUCKING STUPID!
it's something paul would enjoy watching though, ~~cause it's so stewwwpit~~. :D
HAHAHAHAHAHA.
and also the two main chicks are pretty hawwt. the guys are just weird.
i think paul would seriously love this movie. lol!

ELIAS: i hope you had a happy birthday, though you ended up talking to cyn through most of the evening. but that's what you're always good for- talking to. (: 17's nothing near sweet... which is cool. haha!

friday

2006-03-31T16:24:00.000+08:00

YAY!!! IT IS FRIDAY!
i've been having multiple orgasms since midnight.
HAHA. not.

okay, today is gonna be a good day!
nothing will get in my way.
yeayeayea!
we're gonna celebrate elias' birthday tonight at ashley's
aaanddd im not going to get wasted,
neither am i gonna be upset by anything or anyone.
yes. i am so cool. yay.

weekend please hurry!

2006-03-29T19:11:00.000+08:00

I HATE WEDNESDAYS!

my mom is sofa king irritating. she's always making me help out in her stupid flower shop. she has no phone operator for one whole week, so that means i gotta help her. wtf lah! so irritating. i would go get a job but nooo... my dad says he doesnt want me to work when school starts. so like okay, what's the point then. i dont know lah. sometimes i think my parents are like magnets. like mom is a north pole and my dad's south, or smth like that. they're attracted to each other, but yet they are so different and sometimes they seem worlds apart. gawwd! so irritating. my mom can tell me i'll get an atm card as long as i have a job. but when i tell my dad, he says, "no, your mom has no idea what she's talking about!".

seriously! -___-"

stupidfuckpissshitcunt!

ugh. anyways, im having a small headache now.
everytime i get annoyed or smth i get headaches or i get sick.
how irritating. ):
today is seriously not a fun/good day at all.
I HATE WEDNESDAYS!
i've talked to paul just now, but even so he's all grumpy. ):
it's so damn mundane i tell you, and the weather stinks.
i despise wednesdays!
i cant wait till the weekend. friday, please hurry!

LTIFTTFABPTMG not

2006-03-29T02:16:00.000+08:00

i somehow really sincerely hope you're okay, cause i hate to see you this upset. i dont even wanna initiate the next conversation with you, just in case you bite my head off or smth. anyways, i dont know if you'll read this. i am feeling extremely weird now. it's like talking to myself here, cause you probably wont read this. i think. i dont know. anyways, please be happy. and i really cant wait till the next time i see you again. it's only tuesday. oh wait, it's alrdy wednesday morning. shucks, it still feels so far away. i dont care if people read this and have things to say about me. ugh. this is when im wondering wtf am i going on about. but it doesnt matter i guess. nobody's gonna understand this and neither are you gonna read this. you make me so happy, you know? really. i only wish i knew how to be a better source of comfort to people, or at least... to you. i miss you. i really do. i dont always tell you directly, but that's cause you dont say it much either. so i dont wanna feel all stupid again. ugh. okay. this feel weird. please be okay.

And i'll ride on clouds,
Till you come down.
Just promise me you'll always leave the ground.

jemjemjem

2006-03-28T02:28:00.000+08:00

there went the world- number one fan
Safe sex
The diaphragm
Lacking of your self-control

Diary
The top Drawer
Your mother wished she'd never seen
I just wanted to be loved she said
It's something that I never had

Call him at 3 am
Wishing to be reassured
He'd love to
Of course he would
Anything to get you in bed

Goodnight she said
I'm going to start a revolution
And you can be the star of it
It's in my head

Footprints
And fallen Leaves
These are the kind of things lovers think of
Backseats and motels
These are the places that they've been
You want none of these things
These are the kind of things that make us weak

Goodnight she said
I'm going to start a revolution
And you can be the star of it
It's in my head
Goodnight she said
I'm going to start a revolution
And you can be the star of it
It's in my head

There went the world
Just one girl

haha. i actually sorta seriously kinda quite really love this song. (:

))))):

2006-03-27T23:29:00.000+08:00

i am feeling an annoyingly unhappy post.
but i dont want to blog about how i feel today,
cause i dont have any right to feel like this.
and why arent i allowed to?
cause it's just some stupid complicated unwritten law that says so.
):

anyways, i was on a bus back home today. the bus wasnt particularly crowded. in fact, there were a few empty seats here and there. so i cant really understand why that fat smelly man in yellow had to sit next to me. i had only half the bus seat to sit on. it was most uncomfortable from thomson plaza all the way to somerset. it's like singing "reinventing your exit", but singing up 'against the window' instead of 'up against the wall'. stupid chinese man. ugh.

okay, that's all i have now, cause im just not feeling all whoopdeedoo about today.
and i dont wanna post too many negative things here that often.

through the dicord at phunkbar

2006-03-26T22:47:00.000+08:00

okay. through the discord's gig was yesterday.
it wasnt a bad set actually, so you guys stop thinking it's bad please!

yea, photos are up.
they're a lot better than the third place set photos.
http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/entergothika/album?.dir=8575&.src=ph&store=&prodid=&.done=http%3a//uk.photos.yahoo.com/ph//my_photos

or click on latest photos and find the album yourself.

anyway, here are a few photos lah. lazy to type. lol.

OKAY. THE END! yayza.

superbowl is ghey

2006-03-25T02:35:00.000+08:00

OMG!
PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO!
IT'S FUCKING FUNNY!
FUNNIER THAN ANY OTHER VIDEO I'VE POSTED SO FAR.
okay, maybe more retarded than funny, but IT MAKES YOU LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF!

or just click on this link.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2355685700720519560&q=superbowl+is+gay

hahahahhahaahahahahahahhahaha!

ergo propter

2006-03-23T22:30:00.000+08:00

okay, im updating again.
yes, i find it therapeutic to type all sorts of crap here.
yea really, i find it therapeutic.

i have to learn a whole load of songs on bass for tmr. okay, not really, there's no pressure from anyone actually. but im just getting on with my stupid paranoid self. it's weird how i can be an onlooker of my own life and realise how stupid i think sometimes, so yes, i have to relax myself a bit and everything will be okay, right? wrong! ugh. this weekend is so busy. tmr i have to go to rp to matriculate (it's a stupid word) and get my laptop, head down to clarke quay to jam with kian and this dude called tim, then i have to go home and dump my bass there (by the way, i dont even know whether im taking my bass to rp, it depends on the whole timing thing) and then head out again to the third place in outram for a gig. okay, my main concern is that i show incompetency tmr in front of kian and tim. cause i only knew what songs to play yesterday. so in actual fact, i shouldnt be online, but then again, they told me no pressure if i cant get 'unholy confessions'. shitshitshit. i should've practiced my bass more often this whole stupid "holiday" instead of sitting around doing almost nothing. ): anyways, i miss my band. i think i've said this a few million times alrdy, but who cares what you wanna read anyway? heh. okay, i feel slightly better now. so umm. okay, yea, slightly better, but still in agony. ): at least my mom is coming to rp with me tmr, then i dont have to go alone or go alllllll the way there by mrt.

and i hope this answers your question on why i didnt sleep two nights ago...

While you were sleeping
I stared into the darkness
and wondered how I ended up with you so close to me
Resting in your arms is the only thing that comforts and chills me from this night
so please please stay and show me what its like to be in love
I'd do anything at all to catch your smile again

im getting all daphne loves derby-ish these days. nyehh.

alright, i feel better, when i dont think of what i have to do. haha.

i miss nigel

2006-03-23T18:12:00.000+08:00

ho gawwd.
im having a huge headache now.
tmr i gotta go down to rp to verify i accepted the spot.
im reading the whole laptop thing and there's so much to read.
headache. headache. headache. ):
i only hope my mom will go with me tmr so i wont be all confused.
besides, i dont wanna go there alone.
and i hope my dad didnt throw away the postcard rp sent to me.

nigel. i'll poke the holes on your container for you to breathe. says:
i just saw your testimonial pretty girl
nigel. i'll poke the holes on your container for you to breathe. says:
):
nigel. i'll poke the holes on your container for you to breathe. says:
i wanna go home
Streetlights flicker like this match in my hand. says:
hello nigel.
Streetlights flicker like this match in my hand. says:
i know.
nigel. i'll poke the holes on your container for you to breathe. says:
i miss you too (:

okay, yea. im talking to nigel (lee zhen yang) online now,
~~and i cant help but cry again.~~
im hardly talking cause i dunno what to say anymore. ):

i suddenly realise how different everything is now. and i dont really like it. i miss going to green, i miss nigel, i miss my school friends like nora, lizzie, bea, belle, sher, shuyi (chewy. haha.), jennifer, jenny, cassie, nisha, claire, seshaa, sarah, mel, pei yee, etc.etc. okay, i wont go on anymore cause i miss my whole class, the art girls, ally and donn. no matter how fucked up the teachers were, i promise everything was so much simpler. okay, maybe not. but at least there was the comfort from friends. and all the stupid shit we used to do in class. i used to go to green and hang out with my bandmates, and the rest. btw, i really miss my bandmates, esp with everything going downhill in it. fridays were the best, cause almost everyone would go play/watch soccer at the court. everything was so down-to-earth then. but now, it's like so much has changed. it's not that i dont like the people i hang out with now. i love majo, paul, elias, ashley, tiantian and all with all my heart, but it's just not the same anymore. i met a few new people, and honestly, i do like their company, but it just doesnt have that old feel. ugh. i dont know how to say this all in words cause there's a lot more to it, and that's something i couldnt let them judgemental busybodies and hypocrites read here. OKAY, now i seriously dunno wtf im talking about anymore. i just want to go back at least 5 months and enjoy everything heartbreaking/happy about it. well, that's all i gotta say. i think i sound very stupid. but i need to blog about it just so it'll get off my chest.

end.

):

2006-03-22T23:07:00.000+08:00

ni hao.

im listening to 'history' by funeral for a friend now.
it's such a great song actually.
i think i've said the above line like tonnes of times.
anyway, i am damn tired. seriously.
and it's all SOMEONE'S fault! haha.

i've actually been thinking about lots of stuff recently, and i dont know if anything in my life is actually getting better or worse. : how now, brown cow? ugh ugh ugh. i feel like im drifting from what i believe in just so that maybe my life would seem more fulfilled and meaningful. however, in actual fact, i just feel all shit about my actions and thinking. seriously i never felt so immatured in my entire life. it took one word strong word to wake me up. seriously, i just dont know why it took so long for me to realise it has to just end. esp at this point of time. fuck, it's Lent and i havent made good enough sacrifices since im a catholic. and i seriously dont care if people think God doesnt exist. well, fuck you. okay, i take that back. anyway, my conscience are testing me again. i dont know wtf to do about myself anymore. i dont know how to put it. i just dont know where this is all going to.

stupid cunts

2006-03-20T21:05:00.000+08:00

yay yay yay!
4th avenue is playing this friday at the third place!
but nigel is obviously not singing. )))))))))))))):
NIGEL LEE, I MISS YOU SO!
till today, you havent told me what your full name is.
so much for us being bestfriends, back then.
dont think you'll read this anyway.
but we're all looking forward for you to coming home.
okay, now i really feel sad. ugh!

lets have a picture...

yay! me and the BIGGEST rockstar. :D

i stayed at home the whole of today, shaun's dad moved out this afternoon, so i think my brother would get his room in time to come? hope not, i enjoyed having this whole level to myself... okay fine, there's uncle mark there but he's not around most of the time anyways. so my brother would move to the room right next to mine. and it's sorta better, cause the toilet has hot water unlike mine. ): and my old toilet is locked. some doofus locked it accidently. must be those stupid girls who rented part of the house to store their documents and work during the day. you have no idea how stupid and clueless they are. once they came to knock on my door to use my toilet, LIKE HELLO? YOU HAVE A NICE BEEEG TOILET AND YOU WANNA COME WAKE ME UP TO USE MINE? ): stewwwpittza. well, yea, so now i cant sneak into that toilet at night to shower. gah!

my band is currently having a "dispute" again. so yea, life stinks. cause i have less things to do. and suddenly we're going to change our genre to be heavier and less emocore. i only hope the riffs arent hard, cause honestly i havent touched my bass in quite a while. i just lack the motivation to practice since we havent been jamming. ugh. why so irritating like that lahhhhhh?! it's seriously not fair to us all if you dont wanna voice your opinions and at the last minute you tell us you dont wanna do this and that. and then when we try to compromise with you, you get all fickle and contradict yourself and say you change your mind. GROW UP, BRYAN JEREMIAH EE. gawwd. and willy, stop sleeping lah! discuss things halfway then wanna go sleep. idiot. hahahahaha. ANYWAYS, YES. I AM ACTUALLY QUITE VERY EXTREMELY SORTA KINDA REALLY ANNOYED WITH ALL THIS! (looks at leslie) and i dunno where chris has been, but at least he's not being irritating. fuckfuckfuck!

hmmm... speaking of my band, hetts, ally and i have an emo/indie band with no drummer. hetts said she'd look, but i havent spoken to her for ages. i think her internet is down or smth. oh well. so yea, WE ARE LOOKING FOR A DRUMMER. nyeh. and please dont be all anonymous if you wanna apply for the position, it's damn stupid. and yes, you'd be the only guy if you have a penis.

now my face feels all oily.
i will take a cold bath then. ):
damn you, cunt, who locked the toilet door! ugh.
okay, wow, i had so much to say even though i hardly did anything today.
okay, i actually didnt do anything today,
but you dont have to know that.

jangjang.

2006-03-19T22:31:00.000+08:00

im tireddddd.
im tireddddd.
im DAMN tireddd.
but i cannot sleep. ):
i refuse to take the drowsy pills thingum that the doctor prescribed!
it makes me tired and gives me unsettling sleep.
not like i get a lot of sleep anyway.

ANYWAYS,
PAUL GOT INTO SINGAPORE IDOLLLLLLLLLLLL!
YAY!

yup. and i had lunch with my grandma and uncle and family today.
i was uber tired that i didnt feel like eating.
but my mom order so fucking many dim sums
and forced me to eat more than i could. ):
well i got home and lied down, only to get up and go out again.
now im tiredddd but i cant sleep...
(refer to first para)

OKAY. i will do shoutouts today cause i feel like it.

NORA: HIIIIIE!!!!!!!! i thought of you today! i think i told you alrdy, but i dont care cause i feel like repeating myself. and i will link you soooooooooon. and we should go for sushi again. and maybe i'll give you a tweat sometime soon too. (: cause you've been giving me tweats. hahahaha. fuck, till today, im not over 'tweat'. HAHAHAHA. I MISS YOU MY MALAY! what zuziezuky all lah? siaozaaaaabooooooooooooooo. OKAY! im nuts, i will call you at 5am one of these days, regardless what time your school starts. HAHA!

PAUL: I HATE YOU! haha. okay, i just felt like saying that. :D

ELIAS: hahahahahahahahaahahahahaha. and im not grumpy! /:

DONN: NI HAOOOOOO. okay, that's like the only things i can think about these days when i talk to you. HAHAHA.

okay, i've run out of things to say.
BYE!

i must be emo! not.

2006-03-17T18:44:00.000+08:00

being labelled emo is gay.
i think im perfectly straight.
and no matter how "emo" i am, it's no act.
plus, i dont slit my wrist and make out with girls.

go on the net and search th REAL meaning of emo.
cause it actually doesnt mean emotional.
dont be daft yea?

here's a video for you ninnies who think being "emo" is cool.
seriously, watch it, even if you dont think emo's cool. it's funny anyways.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. stewwwpitzz.

yea anyways, i just came home not long ago.
went to the doctor's today.
yes, i know i should've gone to the doctor's like a week ago
cause my eye was giving me problems. ugh.
well, yea, i have an infected and inflamed upper eyelid. ):
there is a friggin sore in my eyelid lah.
and i guess i wont be wearing any eyeliner whatsoever for awhile now.
it's sorta funny and cool, ~~in a car crash sorta way.~~ /:
knnbccb lah!
hmmm.. paul and all are having hangovers. HAHA.
dont drink lah, you twits.
yea, i didnt go for that silly underage party, clubbing sucks. (:
so so soooooo... my eye is sorta okay now after putting the eyedrops.
it's not even liquid drops lah, it's kinda creamy and jelly.
and i have to put it on three times a day
and take a few of three different kind of pills for my nose and dunno what too.
it looks like i have lots of eye shit around my eye lah,
cause of the eyedrops/cream whateverfuck.
and i kinda didnt pay full attention to the doctor
when she told me how to apply the cream. ):

wow wow wow,
im actually talking about my day in detail. HAHA.
right. okay. im bored.
cause today i woke up early for no apparent reason feeling kinda happy.
HAHAHAHAHA. wtf lah.
so like today since everyone is having a hangover/busy,
i did practically nothing, and the doctor's visit was the most exciting thing. -__-"
boooring.
vhat a longgg day indeed.
yay yay yay!
tmr is saturdayyyyy!
coolio, that rhymed. HAHA.
something's getting to my head.
i think cause i really needa piss after all the cokaloka. lol.

so yea...
BYE!!! :D

invisible post

2006-03-16T23:19:00.000+08:00

hi, today i would like to be a little invisible.

just for once, imagine this...
you're walking aimlessly around,
and just following your friends where ever.
you dont know what's coming up next
and neither do you bother to make any noticeable moves.
but you notice something, or maybe someone.
you go home after your day and brush it off
cause as usual, you're doing your best to live each day normally.
the next day, something different happens.
something that causes the side of your crooked smile to twitch a little.
oblivious as you are, you analyse the matter
and once again, you brush it aside with more thought that you should have in mind.
over only four days,
you find that maybe you werent imagining funny things after all.
though half the time you question yourself if you're still doing the right thing,
if this stranger who seems to be a lot more than diminished thoughts really is/could be more than a friend.
but overcomed (grammar?) with paranoia,
you cant stop the disturbing questions and quizzes.
imagine, though you're so fearless of the physical aspects in life,
but more of the mental and emotional torment you would have to go through if all fails, again.

you my friend/reader,
have imagined what's the past week been like for me in 19 lines.
and i couldnt care less about your judgement,
nobody asked you to type/click http://nat-themad.blogspot.com on your server.
(:
why this post is "invisible", has its reason, too.

should've done something but i've done enough,
by the way, my hands were shaking,
rather waste some time with you.

hello strangers

2006-03-16T00:45:00.000+08:00

i would put pictures up of what i did today, but i dont.
i would go to a doctor to check why my eye keeps swelling, but i dont.
i would start sorting out my stuff in my room, but i dont.
i would take my camera out and attempt to capture the full moon, but i dont.
i would be more patient, but im not.
i would be more tolerant today, but i cant.
i would explain why, but i dont.

seriously, if you (the readers) reads this,
please tag my board to say 'hi', identify yourselves
and leave me your links (if you have a blog too).

dark blue

2006-03-14T19:46:00.000+08:00

you seriously fucking piss me off.
you choose to distance yourself,
how is it our fault that we dont discuss what songs to jam
when we all dont even meet up?
you're not doing your part either,
so stop being such a fucking pussy and try.
you give up on fucking everything.
~~even our relationship.~~
everything over stupid things.
FUCKING WAKE UP YOUR IQ LAH.
you hardly talk to us about band stuff anymore,
you and your whatever you have on lah.
you used to care.
fuck, this is the first time after so long i feel so fucking pissed at you.

and that stupid dog-faced slut pisses me off too.
if you think you're sooooo good,
why dont you prove it.
you're jealous, whorish and ugly.
all the money in the world couldnt get you a good enough plastic surgeon.

gawwd.

have you been alone in a crowded room?
well, im here with you.

im fucking unhappy suddenly. ):

2006-03-14T03:27:00.000+08:00

this is me trying to reach you again
this is me not caring anymore

ha. i hope you fucking rot in pieces.

in reply to tags
NORA: err. i forgot the password and your new blog again. sorry. ): and i miss you.

JENNIFER: thank you. and thanks so much about the language thing. i hope you have fun in jc too. hope to catch up soon. miss you're weirdness. lol.

MANDAR: haha. you better call me. i miss you hell lots too. and i have so much to say to you. and you should have so much to say to me too. haha.

2006-03-11T04:25:00.000+08:00

oh yea, photos of through the discord's second set at the third place are up!
some came out quite nice, but they're not very good though. ):
direct link is below.

http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/entergothika/album?.dir=/ab9d

by the way, i am the official photographer for them now,
so i get free gigs with them. woot! :D
anyways, GREAT SET YOU GUYS!

i think the best thing that happened to me today
was getting a free green badge with the disney character 'stitch' on it from seven eleven. :D

2006-03-11T00:13:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wonder how many people notice;
notice that stupid dumbfounded googoogaga look i have whenever i see him.
seriously it's not funny!
nobody knows anything cause i havent told anybody anything,
so if you think im dating someone who has four letters in his name,
well, YOU ARE WRONG! ha!
that's for assuming.
i havent even told donn yet, so if you know, you're quite speeeecial. not.
okay, i did kinda tell ally just now, but anyway,
i dont think im gonna say anything whatsoever to anyone
cause i dont even know what's up here and there.
and im not dating anyone at all, so have a blast!
(?!)
well, wake up your eq lah.
anyway, i dont think he's noticed,
i dont think he cares,
i dont think im good enough (which is pretty sad cause he's not that great either),
i dont think i should think anymore.
gahh!
OKAY, ENOUGH!

my fucking blogger is still in chinese.
so if anyone knows how to change the language settings,
please help me out asap! cause i dont understand shit here.

i hope you think of me at least once today.

chinese blogger?!

2006-03-09T22:56:00.000+08:00

wtf. my blogger settings are in chinese!
how fucking annoying.
anyway, im up for being random today.
so im gonna free write a bit.

ugh. stupid blogger.

im tired lah.

hewihfpeqwf[eqfjq[ = "good times last forever" in kenny's dictionary

happy birthday, jude!

who the fuck has interets and hobbies in sharp objects?

i hate it when people cant spell and spell things wrong

i realise i cant remember which button is the 'publish post' one, and now it's in chinese. brilliant.

yay, tmr's friday! :D

im not feeling myself today.

i am quite tired.

my mom is so strange, i pity her sometimes cause she's always stressed out.

-whines ):

there's nobody to talk to online.

i want coke.

im sorry. sigh.

i somehow cant breathe right today.

i feel so pissed with him now.

fuck off.

stupid shitheads.

ugh.

alright. enough. i hope i can publish this post right. bye.

letters to dad

2006-03-08T20:48:00.000+08:00

dear daddy

please stop shouting so much, it wont make anything better.
everyone is scared of you, especially me.
i dont know how mommy can be so tolerant and unfilching around you.
dont take your frustration out on me,
i've done literally nothing to piss you off.
i stay out of your sight most of the day, so i'll never be "in your way",
like what you usually exclaim while going on in your ramppage.
i dont spend a lot of your money,
neither do i ask for lots of material things from you, unless i desperately need it.
i know christopher can be stupid most of the time and irresponsible,
but if you want to scold him, dont involve me in it.
i've been a good daughter 80% of the time,
and i didnt screw my o'levels up like you expected me to.
im not much of a rebel and i dont abuse drugs or alcohol,
i dont have a boyfriend- just like what you think is sensible for a girl my age,
so even though im "useless", i didnt do anything to wrong you.
please stop shouting?
you get very ilogical when you're angry like this,
and nobody can argue with you, no matter how incorrect you are.
i only burst in tears cause i just cant tell you anything without you getting worked up.
you render me problematic and difficult in times like these.
im sorry, but i do die trying to explain myself to you sometimes,
you have a great illness when it comes to comprehending what i tell you.
maybe if you calm down, less steam will go to your head and you can think clearly?
i know you'll never read this,
but maybe someday i'd have the guts to print this in a letter to you.
i just hope i'll never have to show this to you,
cause it'll be the point where i cannot take your "emotional" constipation anymore.

love
natalie

swollen

2006-03-06T16:30:00.000+08:00

myheartskipsabeat

it really does.
&*@#&^!)(#!@&!$!%$@!^#

fwaaaaa! ):

anyway,
I HAVE A SLIGHTLY SWOLLEN LEFT EYE.
I WANT TO KILL MYSELF CAUSE IT ANNOYSSSSS MEEEEE.
KAPUT!!!

oookay, im going to vomit.
cause myheartskipsabeat and everything in my head just races.

ugh!

by the way, im going to rp to do new media. -__-
im not happy about it.
but i cant be bothered to appeal again. bahh!
okay wait, im NOT going to say 'bahh!' anymore.
i will say 'gahh!'.
~~this is so strange.~~

hmmpf. i am pissed. okay, never mind. BYE.

lmao video

2006-03-03T01:38:00.000+08:00

FUCK. PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO!

it's hilarious! HAHAHAHA.
pay attention to the person at the door too. hahahahaha.

lmao!

okay, this has been a weird day.
i did a strange this first thing i woke up in the afternoon.
and when i came home i had to move out of my room. ):
cause i was getting a new one next to mine and my room's being rented out.
so i took half the day shifting all my stuff and throwing things out with my dad.
tonight im sleeping in my old room, cause i havent moved the bed yet.
it's gonna be so weird sleeping in my empty room.
i dont think i wanna sleep anymore actually. /:
and though i've lived here for less than a year,
my room already has a few memories,
though i dont really like it that much.
so it's a good thing im getting a new cool room. (:
but the toilet is funny. the shower is broken and shit. -__-"
okay, our results will be out officially in a matter of hours.
i am nervous. ):
okay, well i've nothing to say,
partly cause i dont feel extremely sad nor happy today.
lol.

):

2006-03-02T00:28:00.000+08:00

there's so much shit i can take.
you dont need to find out how much that is.

i need to go on a long holiday, far far away.

disappearing day

2006-03-01T02:21:00.000+08:00

disappearing day with hetty and tessa was good, wait no... it was GREAT! :D
~~until i came home and some stupid shit happened. ):~~

anyway, here are photos. im not a genius with my words.

tessa, hett and i. (:

yes, it's my infamous face again. lol.

im sorry! i kow i look major cheekopehk here! hahahaha.

tessa on the bridge. she's scared. hahaha.

hetty! i swear there are no photomanips on any of these photos! (:

tessa.

hetts.

by now you must be thinking... WOW, NAT HAS A NEW CAMERA?
well, not quite. /: but yes, im using a wayyy better one from nikon. (:

SPAZ SPAZ SPAZ!!!! HAHAHA.

as i said, no photomanip at all. cool eh? (:

and then at the end of the day, i learnt how to play 'gin'. (: it's uber fun! lol.

okay, that's it for today.
oh yea, some drunk lifeguard called daryl made friends with us after his shift.
it/he was quite weeeirdd. /:

more photos linked under latest photos. yup. manymany! album is disappearing day.

end!

sinful sunday. ):

2006-02-27T01:52:00.000+08:00

time: 5.30am, location: amk avenue 3.

time: 8.30pm, location: club gas haus.

yea, im bored and i have no life.

late nights

2006-02-25T19:16:00.000+08:00

last few nights were great. i will illustrate them in pixels.

meng's kitchen with the churchies.
however i only have these photos of me and majo. lol.

sarah and i at starbucks. she's moving over to redhill today. ):

SUGAR AND COFFEE!

2006-02-24T01:01:00.000+08:00

HIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHI!!!!!!!!
I HAD WAY TOO MUCH SUGAR IN ONE NIGHT!
AND CAFFINE!
I LOVE MOCHA FRAPPS!
AND JUICEFULS!
MAJO, DO YOU REMEMBER CAT CLASS WITH JUICEFULS? :D
WE USED TO THROW THE WRAPPERS ALL OVER THE FLOOR. LOL.
YAYZA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
NOW I FEEL SOFA KING RESTLESS AND MY LIFE STINKS.
MY RP INTERVIEW IS TMR.
I FIGURED IF I GET INTO RP,
IF FOR THE FIRST FEW MONTHS I HATE IT,
I'LL JUST GO TO NAFA,
EVEN MY MOM AGREES TO IT! HAHAHAHA.
WHOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I HAD STARBUCKS WITH SARAH AT LIKE 10PM.
AND IT'S BEEN THREE HOURS SINCE.
AND SOOOO THIS IS WHEN MY SUGAR LEVEL IS MOST BUZZY.
HAHAAHAHHHAAHA.
I HAVE NO FRIGGIN CLEWWW WHAT THAT MEANS.

ANYWAY, IM KINDA UNHAPPY. AHAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
CAUSE SOMEONE MAKES ME SADDDDDDDD.
WHOOHOO. HAHAHAHA.

OHOHOH.
AND SOME PEOPLE, WHO ARENT EVEN CLOSE TO ME,
THINKS I HAVE A NEW BOYFRIEND!
WELL, FUCK YOU!
CAUSE I DONTTT. :D
~~SO DONT THINK I'LL BE OKAY IF BRYAN HAS A NEW GIRLFRIEND!~~
I CANT PICTURE MYSELF WITH ANYONE ELSE AT THE MOMENT.
IT JUST REALLY SUCKS.
PLUS, SECONDARY SCHOOL BOYS ARE IMMATURE
AND YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO SMS OR TALK TO THEM FIRST,
SO WHY BOTHER? IM NOT INTERESTED IN TAKING CHASE. LOL.
AAAAANDDD, SECONDARY SCHOOL BOYS ARE NOT MEN.
MEN, ARE LIKE STEVIE. STEVIE IS 23 YEARS OLD.
BUT HE LIVES IN TEXAS, WHICH REALLY STINKS.
CAUSE STEVIE IS HAWWT. ~~OLD.~~ A NINJA AND IS MILES AWAY. ):
BOOHOO.
HAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAH!

IT IS LIKE IM HIGH. FUCK, MY HEAD HURTS SO BAAD NOW.
AND PAUL WONT BE CALLING ME TONIGHT TO ENTERTAIN ME.
I MIGHT AS WELL START TAKING SLEEPING PILLS NOW.
CAUSE IM SO UNSETTLED, AND BOREDDDDDDD!
TEEEHEEEEEEE.

I SHALL PUT A COLLAGE ON SARAH AND I TMR EVENING OR SOMETHING.
RIGHT NOW IM TOO LAZY TO UPLOAD PHOTOS INTO MY OTHER COM
AND THEN TRANSFER IT TO A FLOPPY DISC.
YESYES, MY CAMERA IS SPOILT AANDDD I DONT HAVE PHOTOSHOP IN HERE.
GIVE ME BACK MY PHOTOSHOP CD, ~~YOU FAT HOE~~!
LOLLLL!

AND STUPID PAUL HAS BEEN SPREADING MY SHEEPY ABOUT!
STOP IT YOU DUMB ASS!
SHEEPY IS MINE! ANDDDDDD WILLY GAVE SHEEPY TO MEEEEE.
SHEEPY IS MY FAVE EMOTICON! :D
AND I THINK IT'S A RAM, BUT I PREFER TO CALL IT SHEEPY.
TIANTIAN HATES SHEEPY.
HE SAYS SHEEPY MAKES HIM FEEL LIKE PUNG SAI.
AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
I DUNNO WHY BUT PUNG SAI MAKES ME EXTREMELY TICKLED.
YAY YAY YAY.

OKAY, SO STOP STEALING MY SHEEPY. BYE.

thanksgiving.

2006-02-22T20:44:00.000+08:00

went back to school for thanksgiving mass today.
woke up so early in sooo many weeks. lol.
anyway, miss shanti made me change my tee for mass -__-"
i have no idea what's wrong with my tee shirt,
or maybe cause my boxers were showing.
so stewwpit.

OH YEA. AND EVERYONE,
NOTE THAT MY SURNAME FOR MY INDIVIDUAL PHOTO
IN THE YEAR BOOK IS WRONGGGG!

NATALIE ~~SATKUNASINGAM~~.
that is friggin nisha's surname and she's next to me!
STUPID TYPO!
I AM NATALIE JEAN HO SIU JEN!
YES, FOR ONCE I AM ACTUALLY PROUD OF IT! HAHA.
so yea, I HAVE NOT MARRIED AN INDIAN MAN
NOR AM I INDON! BAHH!

oh yes, and do not eat sweet beancurd from sushi bars,
THEY ARE REALLY GROSS!
nora and i learnt well today. hahahaha.

neek's.

2006-02-22T01:41:00.000+08:00

neek's birthday. just a mini collage i did.
photos from majo. (:

tequila

2006-02-19T14:33:00.000+08:00

i cant quite remember what happened last night at neek's party.
it was at faber garden's then over to ashley's condo...
this and that. that and this.
fuck. i hate alcohol so much now.
so this concludes that:
i hate clubbing
(i hate hip hop and r&b, i hate the stupid dancing.)
and now i despise alcohol.

i fell asleep for one hour plus after getting off the phone
but stayed up all night on the phone cause i just couldnt settle my thoughts.
i could hear voices of so many people, paul and elias singing champagne supernova,
and images that just made me feel fucking sick.
it's never been that bad before?
stupid tequila shots.
im so not drinking any undiluted alcohol anymore. ):

well, i hope i havent done anything more stupid than what i remembered last night.
maybe i wasnt as bad as cristian.
haha. the idiot dropped his wallet in a toilet bowl.
okayyy. nothing more to say, cept i attended 7am mass today. woot!

END.

stupid boy.

2006-02-18T15:33:00.000+08:00

right now im seriously damn annoyed.
like seriously fucking annoyed lah.
i think i shall go for novena now,
since i have nothing better to do other than wait.
bye.